Getting upset when losing a game is a common part of child development: it happens when a child's ability to manage disappointment has not yet caught up with how much they want to win. Calm modelling, practice with small losses and clear routines usually help. If reactions are intense or persistent, a professional assessment is a sensible next step, and support is available at Bloom Beyond Enabling in Al Jaddaf, Dubai, through our clinical psychology service.
Many Dubai parents know the scene: a friendly board game ends, and suddenly there are tears, thrown pieces or a child who refuses to play ever again. It can feel embarrassing, especially at birthday parties or on playdates. The good news is that this is usually a skill that can be taught, not a sign that something is wrong with your child or your parenting.
Winning and losing require several skills at once. A child has to understand rules, wait for a turn, tolerate uncertainty and then cope with a result they did not choose. For a young child, losing can feel like a personal failure rather than just the end of a game.
Emotional regulation, the ability to notice a feeling and settle it, develops gradually through childhood. Until it is well established, strong feelings can spill out as crying, shouting or leaving the table. This is a developmental stage, not bad behaviour.
Some children find losing especially difficult because of how they think, communicate or process the world. Children who like things to be predictable may find an unexpected result very unsettling. Others have a strong fear of getting things wrong, which can show up as perfectionism.
Language can play a part too. A child who cannot yet say "I am disappointed" may show the feeling with their body instead, and speech therapy can help children find the words. Sensory factors, such as the noise and excitement of a group game, may also add to the overwhelm, and occupational therapy can help with sensory regulation.
Research suggests that difficulties with emotional regulation are more common in children with neurodevelopmental differences such as ADHD or autism, although many children without any diagnosis also struggle at times. Because every child is different, it is best not to guess; an assessment gives a clearer picture.
Start by naming the feeling: "You were really hoping to win. That feels disappointing." Labelling emotions helps children understand them, and it shows that big feelings are allowed even when certain behaviours are not.
Play short, simple games where the stakes are low, and let losing happen in small doses. Cooperative games, where everyone wins or loses together, are a gentle way to begin. Talk through "what we do when we lose" before the game starts, such as taking a breath, saying "good game" and choosing the next activity.
Model good losing yourself. Say aloud, "Oh, I lost that one, never mind, let's go again." Children copy what they see far more than what they are told. Praise effort and kindness rather than only the result, for example, "I loved how you kept trying."
When big reactions to losing are frequent or intense, structured support can make a real difference. A clinical psychologist can help children understand their feelings and build coping tools, while behaviour therapy approaches can teach flexible responses to disappointment in small, achievable steps with plenty of positive reinforcement.
Support works best when parents are involved, so you leave with strategies that fit your family's routines, whether that is games at home, school sports or time with cousins and friends in Dubai.
Consider speaking to a professional if your child's reactions are very intense, last a long time, happen almost every day, or lead them to avoid play with other children altogether. It is also worth seeking advice if you notice differences in communication, attention or flexibility alongside the upset. Early support is often easier and gentler for children, and many families across the UAE find that asking for advice does not commit you to anything. Our Dubai team is happy to talk through your concerns.
Yes, it is very common, particularly between the ages of three and six. Young children are still learning to manage disappointment, and winning and losing feel very big to them. Patience and repeated, gentle practice usually help over time.
Seek advice if reactions are intense, last a long time, happen daily or stop your child joining in with family life, nursery or school. A professional can look at the whole picture, including language, sensory and emotional factors, rather than focusing on the game alone.
No, not on its own. Many children find losing hard. However, if it appears alongside other differences in communication, play, attention or flexibility, an assessment is a sensible next step, and only a qualified professional can diagnose.
Occasionally, yes, to keep play enjoyable, but not every time. Children need safe, small experiences of losing to build resilience. A balance of wins, losses and calm support works best.
Bloom Beyond Enabling offers child-focused support at 601, 602 & 701 Al Nastaran Tower, Al Jaddaf Waterfront, Dubai. Our team offers clinical psychology, behaviour therapy, occupational therapy and speech therapy under one roof, so your child's needs can be considered together.
If you would like to talk through your child's reactions, you are welcome to arrange an assessment with our team. Call +971 4 554 5234 or +971 52 600 4107, email bloom@bloombeyond.me, or visit us at 601, 602 & 701 Al Nastaran Tower, Al Jaddaf Waterfront, Dubai.
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